Ayn Rand on the current crisis

This is one of the funniest parodies of Ayn Rand and her philosophies. If you're like me, then the unintended humor of Objectivism makes reading her books like reading Mad Magazine. But the good folks at McSweeney's have taken it a step further and rewritten bits of Atlas Shrugged updated for the current financial crisis. Here's a taste!

He fell upon her like a savage, wielding his mouth like a machete, and in the pleasure she took from him her body became an extension of her quarterly earnings report—proof of her worthiness as a lover. His hard-on was sanction enough.

"Scream your secret passions, Hank Rearden!"

"Derivatives!"

"Yes!"

"Credit-default swaps!"

"Oh, yes! Yes!"

"Collateralized debt obligation."

"YES! YES! YES!"

Enjoy!